This post was updated on Nov 29, 2022
Unfortunately, divorce has become a common occurrence in American culture. In light of the ever-increasing divorce rate, numerous research studies indicate that 30-40% of divorcees experience depression and anxiety symptoms.
You can see why it makes sense if you think about it. Change of any type can bring anxiety, and divorce is a major change that comes with its own set of challenges. For instance, insecurity and low self-esteem are common outcomes of divorce. There’s a good chance both parties will wonder whether they’ll ever find another relationship.
For those who didn’t work during their marriage, a divorce can make them anxious about returning to the workforce. Furthermore, when there are children involved, separation anxiety may also play a role. Fortunately, people can deal with divorce anxiety in a number of ways, and here’s how.
What Is the Fear of Divorce?
The term relationship separation anxiety refers to the feelings of uncertainty and fear that many people experience during divorce, or while contemplating one. There are mental symptoms, such as worry about the future, as well as physical, such as increased heart rate, sweating, or lack of sleep.
When you think of divorce as a breakdown of the identity and security you have built your life around, worry and anxiety are natural responses. As you learn how to deal with separation and to accept the changes that are taking place, you start to regain a sense of normalcy.
How Does Divorce Affect Your Feelings?
Divorce is associated with a range of emotions. Those who are going through this life-changing event may find it difficult to acknowledge that these emotions are legitimate and that they contribute to their quality of life. Your feelings may include:
- A feeling of anger and frustration about how things are going
- Feelings of grief and loneliness after a relationship ends
- Feelings of shame or embarrassment, as if you have failed yourself or others
- Fear about the future, along with the worry that you won’t be able to handle it
- Guilt from the impact of divorce on your children
- Uncertain about handling finances
How Do I Deal With Divorce Anxiety?
It is common for people going through divorce to feel anxious. Here is how to deal with that anxiety:
- Grieve if you need to – Embrace your feelings when they arise and give yourself time and space to work through them. This will prevent them from reappearing in the future. Be open to talking things over with close friends – or seek support during this challenging time. Some people find it helpful to keep a journal as a way to understand and make sense of their emotions.
- Change your routine – When life gets tough, routine becomes more essential. As you grieve for the loss of your old life, establishing new habits can help you move forward. Keep yourself healthy by eating well and sleeping well, as well as spending time with friends.
- Change things up – Divorce is a process of letting go of the past. You may find that pursuing a new hobby, or taking a trip to somewhere you’ve always wanted to go helps you stay focused and optimistic during your transition.
- Exercise regularly – Anxiety is primarily a psychological problem, which can also lead to physical symptoms, including sleep disturbances, libido problems, and appetite issues By exercising regularly, your mental and physical health will be improved, reducing some of these symptoms as a result. Whenever possible, remember to spend 30 minutes a day in the fresh air.
Is It Normal to Constantly Think About Divorce?
Divorce is usually something people think about for a long time before they actually do it. A decision about whether your marriage has reached its end is obviously not an easy one, especially when you have worked hard to try to revive something that seemingly lacks love. Therefore, it’s actually a good thing to think about divorce. It’s well-known that making such a big decision requires a great deal of consideration.
How Do I Get Enough Courage to Divorce When I Feel it’s Right?
As you proceed through the process of divorcing your spouse, you may feel that your efforts to protect your marriage have fallen short. Oftentimes, it may seem as though something has been overlooked, or that has yet to be explored. However, the truth may be that you have exhausted every possible resource you can use to salvage your marriage, so you have to explore other options to get yourself back on track and follow through with your decision to leave.
Divorce courage is defined as “the courage to do something that frightens one” or “the ability to cope with pain or grief”. There are several reasons why people fear divorce, including:
- Having a fear of being alone
- Anxiety about starting over
- A concern about losing time with children
- Financial concerns
- Fear of what the kids will think or how they will react
- Pressures imposed by society and religion
No matter if you are the one seeking a divorce or your spouse has told you it’s time to end the marriage, discussing your situation with a professional can give you the confidence you need. There are many possible professionals to choose from, such as a therapist, a divorce counselor, even a family law attorney, as well as your closests friends. With the help of someone who has extensive experience guiding people towards such decisions, taking the next step may be more manageable.
Where Can I Find A Relationship Coaching Retreat For Individuals Following Divorce?
For those who have recently gone through a divorce or are suffering from its aftermath, Pivot can offer personalized coaching sessions specifically designed for divorcees. So, before you decide to give marriage another chance, we’ll work with you to uncover your attachment style, unhealthy patterns of behavior and emotion, helping you develop more effective communication and relationship strategies in case you. When married couples decide to rebuild and improve their relationship after separation or divorce, they can turn to relationship advocates in our Glass House relationship recovery workshops.
Their extensive experience includes guiding couples and individuals to insightful conclusions that lead to positive changes. Don’t hesitate to reach out to us to learn how to start a new chapter in your emotional life.