One moment, you’re showered with expensive gifts and all the attention anyone could ever ask for. Then, your partner gets upset when you socialize and spend time with others, leaving you feeling cut off from your friends and family. Why? This can and will leave you confused about what and, more importantly, why this is happening. And that’s just the beginning of most innocent love bombing signs.
Initially, you may have felt spellbound by your partner’s grand gestures, enough to make any individual feel desired and important. Gradually, the truth behind these actions might start coming to light, getting you to realize that they’re your partner’s means to manipulate you and make you feel dependent on them. What felt like the beginning of a perfect love story can turn into a controlling, abusive, codependent, or manipulative relationship. Learning more about love bombing signs in a relationship can help protect your safety and well-being.
What Is Love Bombing And What Are Examples?
Love bombing is a type of manipulative behavior, involving emotional and psychological abuse. It’s when your partner goes above and beyond for you in order to control the relationship. It’s typically triggered by their dependence on others, inability to trust, and their insecurities. They may also do this intentionally or unintentionally.
Now, what does love bombing look like? While it can have different forms, it typically involves love bombing examples such as:
- Exaggerated praise and flattery.
- Showering you with lots of wanted, unwanted, or unneeded gifts.
- Over-communicating their feelings for you.
- Intense and early talks about building a future together.
Your partner will often use enticing phrases to get a grip of you immediately. These phrases are typically over-the-top and can even cause you to feel uncomfortable. Some common expressions include:
- “You’re the perfect woman/man.”
- “You’re my soulmate.”
- “We’re soulmates.”
- “I’ve never met anyone like you.”
- “You complete me.”
- “I won’t meet anyone like you ever again.”
While these phrases can make you feel like you’re the center of the universe, they’re intended to make you believe so and distract you from your partner’s true intentions.
How Can You Tell If Someone Is Love Bombing?
Spotting the signs can be difficult once you’re caught in the cycle, especially since starting a new relationship is normally exciting, and we generally tend to view the new partner with rose-colored glasses. So how do you tell apart genuine love and actions of a sociopath or a narcissist?
Here are 9 signs that can signify that your partner is, in fact, a love bomber:
- Giving you excessive compliments. If they’re obviously exaggerating and constantly throwing heaps of compliments at you, it can be a red flag. They use this tactic to make your mind connect your self-worth and self-esteem with their opinion of you.
- Spending time with you non-stop. If they want to spend unreasonable amounts of time with you, regardless of your commitments to others or your obligations, they’re probably desperately trying to move forward as fast as possible. You may find yourself ignoring work responsibilities or family or missing out on things you want to do.
- They want to know every single thing about you. They seem fascinated by you and want to learn every detail about you. However, they often use sensitive information to weaponize and control you later in the relationship.
- Exaggerating with expensive gifts. If they give you presents that feel over the top and let you know how much they paid for them, they’re probably trying to make you feel obligated to them.
- Introducing you to important people. They may introduce you to the people who are important to them early on to give you the sense that your relationship is quickly becoming serious. These can be their close friends, children, or family members.
- They need continual validation. You constantly feel you need to reassure them. Compliments are not enough for them. Their constant need to validate their greatness and worth makes up for their fragile and insecure self-esteem, and they heavily rely on you for reassurance.
- Morphing into your ideal match. They can intentionally show themselves exactly who they think you want them to be by constantly agreeing. In this situation, you may notice inconsistencies in what they said at the beginning versus what they say now.
- Saying “I love you” too soon. It usually takes some time for us to fall in love and feel comfortable to say it. While this depends on the couple, the average time for this is about three months. However, in the case of love bombing, it can be a matter of days or weeks.
- They want to move in fast. Moving in together is a beautiful step in a relationship. However, it usually comes a bit further down the road after determining your shared values and compatibility. Their urge to do this early is a way to infiltrate your life and manipulate you.
If you believe you’re dealing with a love bomber, setting healthy and clear boundaries is crucial. Another essential step is to confide with a support system, which can be your family members, friends, support groups, or licensed professionals.
What Does Narcissistic Love Bombing Look Like?
If your partner is trying to manipulate you with excessive attention, they may have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). However, love bombing narcissist signs aren’t much different from those coming from a partner whose behavior is triggered by other motives or disorders. Typically, they’re exceedingly communicative about their feelings for you and may claim that you’re their soulmate. They may flood you with their desire to talk about your future together. Yet, this only serves to gain your full admiration and control over you.
Learn Common Love Bombing Signs And Let PIVOT Help You Manage
If you’d like to learn more about the most common red flags and what to do when you notice them, our experienced professionals can help you gain valuable insights and efficient methods you can use to safely remove yourself from a potentially emotionally and psychologically abusive relationship. We’ll work closely with you through fully personalized individual coaching or a regenerative Glass House retreat, and carefully lead you every step of the way. Reach out to our specialists today and experience the benefits of professional support!